the van list: recipe for good times

Golden Plains Festival

(aka the best fun known to man)

Ingredients:

1 Supernatural Amphitheatre

1 relaxed camping policy

17 camp flags/markers

67 couches

6+ bands with 6 or more members

As much alcohol as desired

8 animal costumes, 5 body painted tuxedos, 7 wedding dresses, token morph suit, range of other novelty clothing

1 novelty clean up song

Minimal security

3000 pairs of shoes

Selection of novelty snacks

1 Cask red wine, selection spices, fruit

4000 glow sticks

Method:

1) Arrive at Supernatural amphitheatre Saturday morning. Due to relaxed camping policy, park wherever and camp in/next to your vehicle. Because everyone knows that making people park their cars and then carry all their gear so they can camp somewhere else is a dumbshit idea.

2) Erect camp flag/marker. Dress in novelty clothes. Wear for remainder of weekend, even if you're the guy who gets his one piece banana suit costume ripped and covered in mud within the first hour.

3) Carry couch(es) to top of amphitheatre. If possible, under one huge canopy set up 3 couches, 2 rugs, and a coffee table (and fruit bowl). Place esky with BYO-ed booze (no glass please) next to couch and enjoy for remainder of weekend.

4) MC will play 4 songs. Choose your favourite. Each time this song is played, all people must simultaneously dance and pick up rubbish. DMX's Party Up (Up in Here) is an excellent choice.

5) Set up one stage only, with as eclectic a range of bands as possible. And remember the old rule: chances are if you have more members, you'll be more awesome.

6) When band plays what you think is the set of the festival, wave shoes in air in show of appreciation. See video for details.

7) If hungry, cook up random selection of gourmet goods to ensure the greatest festival snacks ever.

8) If hungover, mix red wine, random spices and novelty fruits in a bucket to create refreshing, life-giving sangria.

9) When last recognised band of the weekend plays, have an all out massive glowstick war, whilst ensuring that everyone remains as relaxed, friendly and chilled out as they have been all weekend. (a good guide is to see if people are starting a 5am ping pong tournament, rather than wanting to punch on and be jerks).

10) Leave to sit for one amazing weekend.

Tips:

Provide extras such as free breath testing for drivers leaving the festival. Also ensure that security are relaxed and friendly, and don't have any deep down uges to 'smash some cunts'. Nice touches such as this will ensure that your guests will be sure to come back for second helpings.